PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

abandonment

Thursday, Jan. 24, 2002
I spoke to husband about this �abandonment� issue. We are going to �our� attorney and having something legal drawn up stating that we are in agreement for �joint� custody and that we both agree that I am moving out but will still carry 50% of the load of child rearing. After all, I will be going to the house every morning to get Bucky ready for school. I have to be there at 5 a.m. to accomplish this goal. This will be quite a taxing proposition everyday.

He told me that he doesn�t want a divorce. That he wants me to go find myself. Go figure out why I�m so unhappy and to work out my own issues. (here we go again�I�m the one that fucked up? NOT!!!) He told me �I still love you�I want you to be happy�. I remember saying those words to him last year when I was scared.

I�m not scared anymore�..

Thanks for calling me today my dark friend. I needed to hear a friendly voice of concern. And thanks to the person that sent me the email telling me about �abandonment� as an issue. It will be dealt with properly. But I am still the one moving out. Bucky is better off in that house, going to that school�.living his life. And anyone that doesn�t understand my decision�..fuck off! But thanks for the concerns before you do�.. ;-)

-PoeticaL

My hopes are inside a meeting with abandonment.
I have nothing to bet on anymore.
Directing my turn towards the light,
Betting on gentleness and realization.
If I isolate my thoughts,
I would isolate myself.
Fate could be closing
The expired date of my abandonment.
The bond inside my own unconsiousness
Keeps me going.

-Anime � Get the Mind
5:06 p.m. ::
prev :: next