bad day...little sunshine

I�m tired. I�m rundown. I�m stressed out. I do NOT have enough hours in the day. I feel no support from anywhere. I need a drink, I need a date out for dinner, I need a red circled date on the calendar where I do NOT have to do anyTHING. I need a lot. I have today�what feels like too little. I�m thinking about the sand on the couch, the dishes in the sink, the dirty clothes in the basket, the unmade bed (consistency is something I suppose ..no???) I�m thinking about the need for a longer nap, the need for a hug, a kiss, a need for some backbone, the need for a little more self praise and a little less self doubt. I�m concerned about where we will be living in April, I�m worried about doing the moving the packing the doing of the doing I�m worried about it all.

I am sleepy, tired, cranky, grouchy, bitchy, needy, and all over whiney with a side order of horny and wanting and give me and don�t leave me trolling for more.

I want to read a book for pleasure from beginning to end in one sitting, I want to wile away the hours watching some bad 1970�s porn laughing at the inaccuracy of the moan to mouth movement ratio�s. I want to scream out loud lying on top of a red flashy sports car while an airplane flies overhead.

Oh but I must I must read this Learning Team workshop shi�zit and I must find that outline I need to post to the assignment board and I must ask myself why I decided to be the leader of the pack. Why? Why?

Wait�stop the presses��ixnay on the bad mood okay�..because

Tod finally acknowledged publicly and agrees that I am his biggest fan. Ok so I did a lot of years of pimping to get that moniker�so what!! So what that Paul Westerberg probably sits in his basement with his joint and googles his own name and has found it here a million times and not said hello�.so what..he�s talented even if he does ignore me�.so �so what!!! And double triple so what that I am on pins and needles and planning my coursework around the release of Tod�s next novel. So what!!! I�m pathetically loyal to authors I like�.again�so what!!! At least I have good taste and my biggest fatal flaw??? My addiction to books�so bad that I have almost 550 now and I MUST have MOOORE, even though they�re literally sucking up more space than the man and I cohabitate in. Even though I haven�t read a lot of them�.and have read several of them more than three times�.so what!!!

-PoeticaL

p.s. hey Paul...Tod's a fan....go read his books dude. (will the pimping never end???)