PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

bad day...little sunshine

Wednesday, Jan. 26, 2005
I’m tired. I’m rundown. I’m stressed out. I do NOT have enough hours in the day. I feel no support from anywhere. I need a drink, I need a date out for dinner, I need a red circled date on the calendar where I do NOT have to do anyTHING. I need a lot. I have today…what feels like too little. I’m thinking about the sand on the couch, the dishes in the sink, the dirty clothes in the basket, the unmade bed (consistency is something I suppose ..no???) I’m thinking about the need for a longer nap, the need for a hug, a kiss, a need for some backbone, the need for a little more self praise and a little less self doubt. I’m concerned about where we will be living in April, I’m worried about doing the moving the packing the doing of the doing I’m worried about it all.

I am sleepy, tired, cranky, grouchy, bitchy, needy, and all over whiney with a side order of horny and wanting and give me and don’t leave me trolling for more.

I want to read a book for pleasure from beginning to end in one sitting, I want to wile away the hours watching some bad 1970’s porn laughing at the inaccuracy of the moan to mouth movement ratio’s. I want to scream out loud lying on top of a red flashy sports car while an airplane flies overhead.

Oh but I must I must read this Learning Team workshop shi’zit and I must find that outline I need to post to the assignment board and I must ask myself why I decided to be the leader of the pack. Why? Why?

Wait…stop the presses……ixnay on the bad mood okay…..because

Tod finally acknowledged publicly and agrees that I am his biggest fan. Ok so I did a lot of years of pimping to get that moniker…so what!! So what that Paul Westerberg probably sits in his basement with his joint and googles his own name and has found it here a million times and not said hello….so what..he’s talented even if he does ignore me….so …so what!!! And double triple so what that I am on pins and needles and planning my coursework around the release of Tod’s next novel. So what!!! I’m pathetically loyal to authors I like….again…so what!!! At least I have good taste and my biggest fatal flaw??? My addiction to books…so bad that I have almost 550 now and I MUST have MOOORE, even though they’re literally sucking up more space than the man and I cohabitate in. Even though I haven’t read a lot of them….and have read several of them more than three times….so what!!!

-PoeticaL

p.s. hey Paul...Tod's a fan....go read his books dude. (will the pimping never end???)
4:44 p.m. ::
prev :: next