cluttering the net since 2001

bad habit

Saturday, Apr. 13, 2002
Some things are bad habits
Some are just bad for you
And other things are just bad
And that’s all you ever need to know about them…..

Some things never change
And sometimes changes don’t change a thing
Changing some things makes them turn into nothing good
And those changes are changes that happen
But sometimes I wonder if they ever should

If bad things changed into good things
Then I bet some good things turn into bad
And then you have the same damn thing that we’ve
Always and already had

Its all like one giant riddle
One that’s not even slightly amusing

I chatted to "him"…. PoeticaL: I’m here 5 minutes and I remember why I hate it here
Poetical : everyone that comes here is fucked
“him”: ya you awrny shit
PoeticaL: *shrugs*
PoeticaL: and this lady reminds me that all people on pal think they're a star...but are usually duds
“him”: hehe oh geeeeez
“him”: my voice sux too this is the time of year it changes
PoeticaL: well......its all coming back to me like a bad dream
“him”: until the season settles in
PoeticaL: I'm convinced you don't have a "good time" of the year
PoeticaL: <---rolls eyes
“him”: they call bad dreams reoccuring nightmares
PoeticaL: yes....that's IT
PoeticaL: pal = reoccuring nightmare
“him”: lmao
“him”: thats fucked up
PoeticaL: well that's exactly what the fuck it is
PoeticaL: same stuff over and over again
“him”: then log off
PoeticaL: well....the thing of it is....my life....
“him”: i dont come here to solve my whole lifes problems
PoeticaL: is the SAME THING....
PoeticaL: hahahahahahahahaha
PoeticaL: nah.....
PoeticaL: I'm actually pretty ok
“him”: your life is real right there in FL
PoeticaL: yup
“him”: and i dont see it being that bad
PoeticaL: its not anymore
PoeticaL: i'm doin fine
“him”: brb need H2O
PoeticaL: I did one thing right......got YOU to drink water
“him”: back
“him”: about alll i drink anymore is water
“him”: filtered stuff not city crap
PoeticaL: good
PoeticaL: know what?
“him”: what
PoeticaL: everything is actually pretty damn cool right now
PoeticaL: I'm just my worst damn enemy
PoeticaL: too hard on myself
“him”: yes
PoeticaL: I need to learn to chill and just enjoy and stop worrying about everything
“him”: Yep dont sweat the small stuff
PoeticaL: yeah someone told me that once.....I shoulda wrote it down but....*shrugs* HAHAHAHAHA
“him”: i always say that
“him”: your a brat
PoeticaL: I am?
PoeticaL: hmmm
PoeticaL: what the fuck ever lol
“him”: always want your way
PoeticaL: well I never get it
“him”: when you dont get it your pissed
PoeticaL: lol yeah whatever
“him”: to me your still a brat
PoeticaL: brat IS NOT a nice word
PoeticaL: stop being a fuckstick lol
“him”: hehe
“him”: hey thats my word
PoeticaL: yeah....but it's your name too
PoeticaL: lol
“him”: no
“him”: its Mr. V(*@& to you
PoeticaL: <---holds finger up to screen
PoeticaL: NEVER
“him”: you get my coat
“him”: open the door for me
PoeticaL: <---bends over.... "kiss my ass!"
“him”: hehe
“him”: you address me as sir
PoeticaL: fuck you sir
“him”: damn
PoeticaL: damn what?
PoeticaL: I said SIR
“him”: you treat royalty that way
PoeticaL: when I meet royalty I'll treat him like the king that he is and kneel before him and worship him
PoeticaL: it hasn't happened yet
“him”: lol
PoeticaL: and I ain't practicing on you
“him”: im already royalty
PoeticaL: pffffffffffft
“him”: hehe
PoeticaL: it might be easy to fool someone that doesn't already know better
“him”: i got to in front of everyone
“him”: hehe
PoeticaL: I saw that
PoeticaL: lol
“him”: funny shit
PoeticaL: you always do that
“him”: i dont know how
PoeticaL: cause you're a brat
“him”: no your the brat
“him”: im the “him”
PoeticaL: <----leans over to puke in her garbage can

we chit-chatted…it felt nice…it was nice..it was like a pill to ease my addiction….and then he sang….and said he had to go make a phone call…..I’ll be ok….at least for another two weeks or so….*sigh* But I should mention….I finally told him I was back with husband….he didn’t say another word just said “I’m gonna sing a song for you” He sang this song…….and I still can’t figure out why……..*sigh*

Best Of Intentions

I had big plans for our future
Said I'd give you the whole world somehow
I tried makin' good on that promise
Thought I'd be so much further by now
Never could build you a castle
Even though you're the queen of my heart
But I've had the best of intentions from the start

Now some people think I'm a loser
'Cause I seldom get things right
But you make me feel like a winner
When you wrap me in your arms so tight
Please tell me you will remember
No matter how much I do wrong
That I had the best of intentions all along

I gave you a ring
And I promised you things
I always thought we'd do
But my best-laid plans
Slipped right through my hands
To show my love for you
And if you could read my heart
Then you'd know without exception
It was all with the best of intentions

So here I am asking forgiveness
And praying that you'll understand
Don't think I take you for granted
Girl, I know just how lucky I am
Though you deserve so much better
You won't find devotion more true
'Cause I've had the best of intentions
Girl, I've had the best of intentions
Yes, I've had the best of intentions loving you
-Travis Tritt
1:13 a.m. ::
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