cluttering the net since 2001

don't trust anyone to sail your boat on their sea

Wednesday, Jun. 26, 2002
If you need to verbally tell me something, you now need to ask Captain Ron for clearance. His diary’s listed in my profile. He’s a good body guard, so you better just yell loud from wherever you are and hope I can hear you. I suppose though if it mattered to anyone they furiously scribbled my digits last weekend and so they don’t have to go through Ron. But since no one called, I assume it doesn’t matter. Every time I read Ron’s diary I want to go buy a ton of those cheap plastic boats you buy for your kid and lay in a bathtub full of hazelnut flavored bubbles and pretend I’m a Captain too. Maybe I’ll turn the Jacuzzi on and have a pretend hurricane. Then I’ll scream “bubbles overboard…JUMP!”

I just remembered that every time I played in the tub I got pissed because that wind up seal would stop before he ever reached the edge. It’s hard to wind a plastic mammal with wrinkly fingers.

Now I’m wondering if “Bucky” gets mad at me when I make him get out when the water gets cold. My Mom used to empty the tub some and fill it up with hot water again. But she just wanted to leave me somewhere where she didn’t have to see me. Maybe she hoped I couldn’t swim. Come to think of it, that water was always up there close to the edge. They say most accidents happen in the home.

The last Christmas I was at home, I got luggage. All I want is a Snoopy suitcase. I think if I had one I could go somewhere happy with my happy stuff. I can’t find a snoopy suitcase. When I do a search on the net for one I find my own website. I saw a Snoopy backpack once. It was furry and was a big giant dog face.

I did find this http://page.auctions.shopping.yahoo.com/uk/auction/64169765?aucview=0x10 Do you think he could balance on a plastic boat?

I just noticed I have a chow chow dog hair stuck in my nail polish. I can’t send a dog hair to California along with my fingernails. Can I? I wonder if he has any dog nails in that jar. Hmm… I could put the dogs in the bath tub, play sailing, then cut their nails and then pack them up into a paper snoopy suitcase I construct myself somehow. Maybe fill up a plastic boat with toenails. I have to do something creative. After all my name is on the package.

Wait.. I think I need to go to the beach with some nail clippers and send lots of nails. The more the better. Maybe I could meet some cute guys on the beach. Wait, what kind of guys would let a girl clip their nails on the beach? Someone with a sense of humor, that’s who! What kind of girl thinks about this stuff?

Anyways, if you have a snoopy suitcase, send it to Captain Ron and he’ll check it for booby traps and then he’ll send it to me after he calls me to advice me on Snoopy safety of course. teehee… Wait, that’s if he’ll give you his address. Damn it, this safety shit sucks. Hey Ron, hunt down my address via my cell phone information and send me a snoopy suitcase. K? Oh..did you say that’s impossible…hmm….

11:18 a.m. ::
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