PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

guilt flows and it grows and it....

Saturday, Sept. 03, 2005
I just heard on our local Bay News 9 coverage that our local TIA (Tampa International Airport) is awaiting the arrival of refugees from New Orleans. These people are in need of medical care. They have set up triage facilities at the airport and then these people will be moved to the local hospitals as needed.



The relief that I feel in knowing that we too are doing something in our area to help other’s is just a small blip in helping the despair I feel over all that has happened. So many lives affected and forever changed. It’s overwhelming.



I have found myself feeling guilty as I drive to work to take on another “normal” day. I have found myself feeling guilty as I sit in my comfortable home eating my hot dinner watching the devastation on the television nightly. I have given to the Red Cross, I could say I have done my part. However, it doesn’t feel like enough.



How can I sit here typing on my laptop as my tv blares in the background and I continue on with my own full life as though nothing has happened and not feel guilt? I wonder if others have been feeling these things I have been feeling.



There haven’t been many hours in the last days that I have been able to go about life without stopping in my tracks and realizing there are so so many people that would love to have just another day of the same old stuff like the days that they lived before. As I wash my hands with clean water, get in my car and go to the grocery store for milk, as I fold clothes, as I look around at everything that I own and all that I have…as I shower in hot water….the guilt overcomes me and I wonder exactly what is it that I am experiencing and then I realize it’s ok, it’s ok for me to feel these things…it might just be because I am human and my mind is still processing through the hell that has touched earth.
2:24 p.m. ::
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