cluttering the net since 2001

in vain - poem

Monday, Nov. 11, 2002
Sometimes a thousand things come to me all at once and end up making no sense at allÖ.like thisÖIím actually ok, I just need someone far more than I wish I did. I wish I needed nothing. Nothing is easy to getÖeasier to keep..

in vain

I wish that I could go back
simply with one flick of wrists
undo the threads in me that
tie themselves too
tight to everything that is you
take away that thing from then that is everything that is now this
and then again
would that ever make me free?
without you there I still can't hide from me

I shouldnít wonder about you.
Or count the questions I have
So little answer for.
No matter what I canít make
Youíre red turn into purple
Nor make you ache for more

Where would I be
Had I not let you lead?
Just tie me tighter
Away from my fear
Iím afraid I would still
Be sitting right there
Waiting to die
From the way I bled

This struggle to become
Something I havenít yet
Is about my wishing to
Want you
Instead of knowing it is all
Something I cling to
Because I need you instead

So tie me tight
Iíll cut myself loose
Before I strangle
From hanging on
Your offered noose

Sometimes I wish I were just dead
Death has silence
And all I hear is the panic
Of my constant dread

A bad rhyme always tells
The tale
When Iím scared I canít
Speak clearly from
My muffled hell

And so before you
Write me a letter
Donít think twice
Just once about how
You should have been
Something so much better

Cut the veins
Iíll fly away
And without your wings
Iíll die today

8:57 p.m. ::
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