PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

jogging 2 miles...pc boy

Sunday, Aug. 18, 2002
t: ;-)

t: morning

me: lol hi

t: got a few minutes before I go out running

me: i see

t: so how was your run today

me: lol

t: what?

me: nothing

t: so what ch up tpp

t: too

me: nothing

t: what else

me: nothing else

me: i'm just sitting here

me: i cleaned the house

me: i straightened out my cds today

t: sounds like you just had a blast!

me: phhft

me: i've been with bucky all day

me: yoyo split

me: no clue where he is

t: ok

me: so i couldn't go do anything without taking bucky along

t: true....

t: you dont think that he wouldn't enjoy a walk with mom?

me: lol

me: we went on the bikes

t: oh ok...

me: he has a kickass bike

t: about 20 miles?

me: lol

t: ;-)

t: no?

me: no

me: and....

t: ...;-)

me: i was upset with you

me: i lied

me: you wanna change me just like “him” did

me: and worse yet ...he called me and woke me up this morning to tell me to stop being lazy and get my act together and I said "yeah I guess...now I gotta do more than read a book, I gotta run 2 miles..." I explained and guess what. He agrees with you.

t: LOL

me: that's not LOL

t: and I am not trying to change you....

me: he has changed his mind about you and now is on YOUR side

me: he said he's all for anyone that wants me to get my shit together

me: he wears on my last nerve

t: I am not trying to change you...

t: picture this..

me: hmmmpfht

t: me about 11 years ago...getting ready to join the army....

me: heres what I picture...Im' gonna go find some guy I can wrap around my finger...who does nothing but lick me all day

t: <-------raises his hand and jumps up and down

t: pick me

me: lol nope

me: I told “him” he could have your nick...the two of you are perfect for each other

me: ya know what he said

t: whta?

me: he said "if you keep liking awesome guys like us why don't you just fix your ass so you can have one"

t: hmpft

t: there is nothing wrong with your "ass"

me: ok here's what he said

me: he said you want me to be happy

me: same thing he wants

me: and when I sit around saying i can't sleep and i'm unhappy and sad and blah blah blah you just want me to go find happiness

t: you cant find happieness.....

me: have to make it

t: either it is there or it isn't....

t: and it has a lot more to do with what is inside than what surrounds you

me: bull

t: hmpft...

me: come sit in my life for awhile and tell me that

t: then how can I be sitting here in a shit hole and be happy?

me: um

me: thats cause you're delusional

t: nope..

me: we've established this

t: nope...

t: I am not delusional...

me: hmmmm

t: tel you what...

me: but you think I'm all that

t: you are all that and a bag of oreo cookies

t: so hpmft

me: kristy = mass confusion, sadness..blah blah

t: hmpft....

t: nope....

t: kristy = sexy, erotic, misunderstood

me: hmmm

me: well he also seems to think that even if I ran 2 miles everyday I can't have you

t: lol

me: cause you're life's the army and you don't have room for me and I had better get that in my head

t: you can have me even if you dont run at all

me: he called me up on a sunday morning to tell me not to fall for you cause i can never have you

t: ok...

t: I though he was on my side?

me: on the "wanting me to change" issue he is

t: and yes the army is a big part of my life....

me: well like he said "he'll be someplace else always....how can he be what you want?"

t: hate to say it but that is the army life...

me: well...hate to tell you but I've known this all along have I not?

t: that is why it is so hard for some people

t: yes you have

me: and do you think I have issue with that/

me: ?

t: *shrugs*

t: not now

t: there is a friend of mine here...

t: George Cassels.....

t: smart man....

me: ok..

t: CCIE, CCNP

t: MCSE etc right

me: ok

t: do you know how long he was at home this year?

me: lol one week

t: six weeks total

me: and is he married?

t: yep, two kids

me: and his wife...is she kewl with it?

t: some what.....but he is getting out of the army here in feb though...

me: because of her?

t: too much money for a warrant to make on the outside

t: and a little bit because of the family issue

me: t...

t: yes

me: listen to me

me: none of my doubts..about anything have shit to do with the Army

t: ok

me: thats an issue I thought about a long time ago

me: and had to decide back then whether I thought I could deal with it

me: “him” likes to point out that I’m not real because he never met me

me: right?

me: for 3 years now I'm not real

t: right

me: but all his lame ass girlfriends are real

t: what ever

me: the ones that dont' have time for him

me: the ones he cant' talk about work with

me: the ones that don't care what he's doing or not doing

me: right?

t: ok

me: so he calls me up because none of them can ever be that towards him

me: but I'm not real

me: doh

me: let me tell you the same thing I told him

t: ;-)

me: about this whole thing

t: ok

me: you are real

me: just because I haven't touched you doesn't make you any less real to me

me: i know you exist

me: i feel you in my life

t: <----pinches himself to make sure

t: ouch

me: you don't have to touch me for me to know this

me: and if you and I were together and you had to go you'd still be real

me: you might be somewhere else

me: and I might wear out a lot of vibrators in the interim

me: but if you were my best friend....and I could communicate with you the way we do

t: ;-)

me: i'd be happy

t: ;-)

me: i know these things because I have lived in a house with someone for ten years that never got me

me: he's right there

me: in front of me

me: every day

me: and he's never seen me

me: known me

me: do you understand what I'm trying to say?

t: yep...

t: I do

me: so ... so what if you're 7,000 miles away

me: it makes sex impossible

me: but everything else is there

t: yep....

me: ok so..... i've been in the middle of stuff where there was nothing...

me: and if you were only with me for 6 weeks....so be it

t: ;-)

me: as long as you weren't out fucking half of the world while I missed you

me: i'd be ok

t: ;-)

t: hey...love

me: i know

me: you gotta go

t: I only plan on doing the 2 mile course for time

me: what?

t: I only plan on running 2 mile this morning...

me: ok

me: t

me: you can do whatever you want to do

t: and I am going to time myself to see how fast i am

t: ;-)

t: I know

t: I was just telling you is all

t: ;-)

me: lol ok

me: why you so happy today?

t: it is a run day!

me: ok

me: he asked me if I was gonna go find a track

me: and run

me: i said "yeah....no one's telling me that I can't do something or even thinking that i can't"

t: ;-)

me: i dont care if you never see it

me: i'll know I did it

t: good girl!

me: he asked me how I was gonna feel if they deploy you from afghanistan to somewhere else

me: if I never met you

me: how would I feel

me: that I wouldn't surely be all dissapointed and why am I setting myself up

me: hey if they ship you somewhere..then that's whats meant to be...besides its not like your sitting somewhere with a pocket ful of money not buying a $150 airline ticket for no damn good reason"

t: LOL

t: good..

me: he really needs to leave me alone

t: besides the only other place they would send me other than here is to the west

me: the west?

t: (wink)

t: look on a map and see the countries to the west of here

me: c'mon just tell me

t: I cant say...

t: but it starts with an "I" and ends with a "Q"

me: yeah well I assume that I may never meet you

me: i have to make that assumption

me: don't you think

t: yep...

t: but I should get going babe

me: ok bye

t: I should be back in a little while....

t: couple hours maybe

me: k

t: ok

t: ;-)

t: you gone?

me: nope

t: hello?

me: i'm here

t: ok

t: had to check

me: lol

t: buh bye love

me: bye

man I really don’t want to have a yahoo chat boyfriend….forever…. But I tell ya what I'm gonna fucking learn to run at least two miles. No boys are gonna tell me I can't!

9:56 p.m. ::
prev :: next