cluttering the net since 2001

last night in a house

Friday, Mar. 01, 2002
Tonight is the first night of the rest of my life or something like that….. I signed my lease and I got my keys and husband is currently loading odds and ends into his “pussymobile” and I’m sitting online listening to “him” sing. Something very strange about this scene, like something out of a movie. *shrugs*

It was the oddest thing cause I was standing in the center of my new apartment looking around like “wow look what I got myself into” and my cell phone started to ring…I look at my phone and it says “him home” same as “him calling”. I answered and he says, “I’m here looking at a phone bill I got today and I wanted to ask you to explain to me what you and I talked about for 330 minutes but could you do it in less than 5 please…the cliff notes version this time ok?” And I burst out giggling….and in that moment I knew that things were going to be ok. Ok because I can still laugh…and as long as I have that…it’s all good.

And besides….my husband is not acting like the creep he could be acting like. He’s over there right now hanging my prints on the walls the way I wanted him to. Setting up my dining room table….and generally doing stuff for me over in my apartment while I sit in the house and play on the pc. It’s gonna suck when I gotta do everything myself. Really suck!

“He’s” singing “you won’t ever be lonely”. I am glad that he’s in my life. If we are destined to just be friends…I’m glad he’s being my friend in a time in my life when I need one. I hope that we can find some resolution to the ups and downs and find some happy medium.

I want to take the next 7 months and grow as a person and figure out what it is that I really truly want. Not in the throes of confusion either. I want to walk around in my panties and do whatever the hell I want. I never had that option. Now I do….it might not be pretty…but it will be interesting….


Last Night

And even in your darkest hour
The recipe I cook for you
Can release its latent power
And make your body feel brand new
Can't you hear the music play
Being centre of what you want
Try to leave the past behind
Memories don't appeal
All the things we said
All the things we did
All the things that passed
Were satisfied...

E. Anderson
9:36 p.m. ::
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