cluttering the net since 2001

let me not talk about it

Friday, Dec. 15, 2006
When all else fails…lets talk about something else. Let’s forget about my crappy Math class where my software is not working, the teacher is taking a week off (great a substitute in a college math class…wonderific!) Let’s talk about how work has been crazy and issues there have been nuts too. Let’s talk maybe about how much my husband works sometimes and how much time I spend alone with my thoughts. How about talking about Christmas? I’ve bought one gift….I’ve done no other shopping. I don’t want to. I don’t have any decorations up and I am seriously thinking I’m skipping it this year. I’m tired..have a headache…need a cup of coffee and feel completely empty.

Yah ok so talking about something else works out well …right?...right?

Today I read a quote on one of my co-workers Office Communicator template. It was
"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride"

I thought…gee that’s great. Now if I could only feel that cheerful right now.

Rick glanced at my diary last night and said, “This is why I hate your diary…it upsets me.” Gah!

The misery is disgusting. I feel like I can taste anything, I can’t feel anything and I can’t see anymore color in the world right now. I wish I could just drink a glass of wine, eat some chocolate..read a new book and feel better. I did buy two new books last night, but I wasn’t even excited about it. Let’s talk about them.

I bought

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and I finally broke down and bought this…

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But the book club is currently reading…

1. The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
2. Running with Scissors – Augusten Burroughs
3. A Simple Plan – Scott Smith

We have picked 3 books since some members are on vacation for the holidays and are scattered around the country right now and we’ll be meeting towards the end of January so we’re able to keep reading throughout the weeks.
I’m so desperately sad I pulled out the big guns

From: Kristy
Sent: 15 December 2006 15:42
To: brandon@########

I'm kinda sad about a few things happening right now in my life. Ya think you could unruffle those guardian angel wings and send some good vibes my way across the vast ocean between us?


And I almost immediately got this back

From: Brandon [mailto:brandon@#######]
Sent: Friday, December 15, 2006 11:41 AM
To: Kristy
Subject: RE:
AWWW....talk to uncle BraN...wazzup? Whats there to be sad about in life...as long as ya got ya health and you know ppl love you there's no problem right?

That email made me break down in new tears. Good god it sucks to just be so sad despite being so grateful that I have so much in my life.

Not talking about it didn’t work out so well.

11:45 a.m. ::
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