PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

piss on having no income

Saturday, Feb. 12, 2005

I have a confession to make…..due to Tod single G’s blog entry about Tom Sizemore’s jailed experience for using a fake penis to provide someone else’s piss for a drug test.So here’s my confession….as reported in the Tod single G’s blog today.  …..

I'm going to tell YOU how I made extra cash last August of '04, but I would NEVER tell anyone else.

In the State of Florida one cannot breath it seems without getting arrested for something or other. I had an acquaintance through an acquaintance through an actual friend of mine. My friend told me that the acquaintance of the acquaintance was on probation and was in the "need" for clean P. (not Q..but yes..P) I was told that the person in P. "need" was looking to pay upwards of $100 monthly to the holder of clean P. I looked within myself and realizing that I was low on $ (not ! but $) and that I was the perfect candidate for nice warm fuzzy sorts of clean P. that I could earn some more $, I decided to meet with the vagrant in need. I was handed ten vials and told that if I provided one of these to the address on the post it note every Tuesday between 8:30 and 8:45 a.m. that there would be a $50 money order in the mailbox. The first Tuesday I arrived (after much deliberation about my skills to fill up a vial with the diameter of a quarter...I mean that takes skill or the brains to fill up a larger throwaway container and use a specified P-Funnel) there was a $50 money order left blank in the mailbox. I took the money order and left the special P. I did this for 2 months and NEVER saw the person for whom my P. was golden, but I made $400 from this person in need. Unfortunately for me, said person was released from probation and the last week I went to deliver there was a note along with the money order that stated "thank you you're services are no longer needed". I dug out a pen and wrote back "Awww man...well piss off then! :-)" on it.

At one point I did ask the friend of mine who knew the acquaintance of the acquaintance of the me pee receiver how the heck the receiver could keep my valuable clean pee at body temperature. I was told that it would be heated via a microwave and then the vial (that was sooo small) would be "inserted" into receiver's body as receiver was female, until it was needed.

Yes....I sold my Pee to an unknown "inserter". For this I am not proud...as for two months I was very "_athetic".

But...I paid the rent and no one was harmed.

 

(keep in mind that Aug. was the month I had NO job....also the vagrant I met up with....was not the receiver but the acquaintance of the acquaintance.....and yah honey if you're reading this...it was an acquaintance of your half brother's old girlfriend's....and yah I sorta told ya...but I never told ya I was making PEE MONEY...sowwy! :-(

9:44 a.m. ::
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