PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

rain rain...drain away

Monday, Apr. 12, 2004
Easter wasyah. It was disappointing. However, my son was not disappointed nor was he anything but great to be around all weekend. And so was Sean, b.f.s nephew. I like that kid. We talked at great length yesterday and I would have to say that hes a smart kid with a lot of insight.

I have been majorly bitchy lately about most everything because Im majorly stressed out. I dont process stress well. Add to that the fact that Im changing my eating habits and trying to be more active and spending most of my free time alone, and its all disaster.

Most of the time I dont think I am cut out to be a part of anything that takes two people to make it happen and happen well. I never got the necessary skills in my life to make these things copasetic.

Its rainy out today. Completely overcast. This is not Florida weather. The ex came back, no apology about his bad behavior and I am just tired of fighting it all. I accept the fact that hes a psychopath and psychopaths never change so Im done getting upset over that issue. I hope!

Did talk to b.f. briefly this afternoon and it would appear that were going to sit down tonight and talk. Knowing you are going to have a talk with someone can be so anxiety inducing.

I just want a hot cup of coffee, a big fat chair to sit in, a new book to read (a good one pleaseI havent read a really awesome book in far too long) and a quilt. I feel cold inside. I feel empty. I feel lost.

I miss you m.p. !
4:06 p.m. ::
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