the way you are? or the way I will be?
and I am not talking to 't'
t: ?
me: ?
t: hey you
me: you hey
t: when did you get back?
me: get back
me: i never left
me: well not very long
t: yes you did...
me: i
me: can't
me: sleep
t: why not
me: i don't know
me: who ever knows
me: why i can't sleep
t: need some one to wear you out
me: i sit up and i feel sleepy
me: then i lay down and i'm wide awake
me: then i roll around and get frustrated
me: so then i sit up
t: sit up and sleep?
me: i can't do that unless i'm at work
t: that is not a good place to sleep
me: yes but it's boring there
t: right....work is fun
t: ;-)
me: phhhft
t: you could go out for run?
me: lol
me: you're funny
t: nope...
t: or a walk
me: in florida in the dark
me: it was nice knowin ya
t: it is nearly 530 there...
t: sun should be coming up
me: its 6:14 a.m.
t: ok
me: and no sun
t: day light yes...sun
t: and
t: I will walk around FL at night no prob
me: thats you
t: 614 ....no sun?
t: that is not right
me: nope
me: no sun
me: yet
t: at 614 in nc there is sun
me: *shrugs*
me: i can only tell you what time it is and
that there is only dark
t: must be the northern lights?
me: and that i can't sleep
me: and that no one can fix it
t: no one?
me: no one as of yet
me: i am a sad emotionally unstable girl who
can't sleep
t: just wait.......
t: when I get there...
t: I will wear you out...
t: running...
t: pumping iron
me: i have so many hangups i have clothespins
falling out of my ass
t: push up
me: lol
me: as if i could ever do those things
me: surely you jest
t: why not?
t: I used to say....
t: I cant do that...
t: I could never do 80 sit-ups in less than 2
minutes
t: I could never run two miles in 13 minutes
me: lol this is humorous
t: why?
me: because i will never do those things
t: I was a certified couch potatoe...
t: befroe the term was invented
t: why wont you?
me: because I just won't
me: surely you don't think you can convert me
t: yep...
me: HAHAHAHAHAHA
me: you are a funny guy
t: I know that I will never be able to run 13
2-mile again
t: now days I am lucky to make 16 min two
mile
t: oh well
t: <----places his hand on Kristy's forehead
t: <----yells "YOU ARE CONVERTED MY CHILD
t: :-)
t: there
t: better
me: phhhft
me: you're funny
t: no phhft
t: and no phhhft either
t: ;-P
me: lol
t: :P
me: lol
t: so....
t: why do you think that it is not possible?
me: because I am realistic
t: and so am I...
t: do you know what I did my fisrt 2 mile run
int?
me: you are highly optimistic
t: 27 minutes it took me
t: 27 minutes....
me: i don't know if I could run 2 miles in any
amount of time
t: sure you cna...
t: can
me: lol
t: you just have to give it a shot
me: you don't know me so well
t: trust me
me: yes but why?
t: trust me...
me: why would I want to?
t: why would I want to bicycle for 100 miles?
me: cause your nuts?
t: so I can say i did it...
t: that is all
me: phhhft
me: i can say I ran 2 miles
me: hey t ...I ran 2 miles
me: see how easy that was?
t: hmpft
me: hmpft nothing
me: i'm a mess
t: have you ever heard of runner's HIGH
me: i don't know why you don't listen to me
t: becasue I am deaf....I told you that
already...
me: ok then
t: now...
t: of course...
t: when you start off running....
t: you should pick a distance ....
t: 2 miles is a good place...
t: now...
t: are you listening Kristy?
me: yes
t: ok,.....
me: <---puts head on wall
t: do you have access to a standard running
track?
me: i have no idea
me: lol
me: why would I know this?
t: local high school should have one
t: why wouldn't you..?
me: sure...and I know exactly where that is
t: ok..
me: because I don't run
me: lol
me: doh
t: now ...
t: 8 times around that track is 2 miles
me: OMG
t: 8 short laps is all
me: i'd be lucky to walk around 8 times
me: geez I gotta go get a personal trainer
t: then start with walking 8
me: how long are you stuck in afghanistan?
t: listen...
me: i am listening
t: I am giving straining advise....
t: unless you dont want it?
me: straining advice
me: lol
t: trainingi
t: trainining
me: no you were right the first time
t: ok...
me: <---puts head on wall and listens
t: same thing...then...
t: ok...
t: now 8 laps...no problem right...
me: ok
t: you could start off by walking 8...
t: right
me: ok
t: right
me: ok
t: ok
me: ok
t: then the next time...
me: i said ok
me: lol
t: run 1/2 lap...and walk 1.5 laps....
t: ok
t: ok
me: ok
t: then the next time run 1 walk one....
t: and so on and so forth...
t: right..
me: ok
t: of course...
t: I know that it is hard than it sounds...
me: nothing is impossible if you keep at it
t: i am trying to explain...
t: don't give in
t: than after a few weeks when you are
running around the track 12 times or so...
t: then start timing yourself....
t: use inteval training to decrease your
times
t: so how does that sound?
me: exhausting
t: I aint going to lie to you...
t: it will be..
t: You should be sore the first few days...
me: but wait...who said I wanted to run 2
miles?
t: and are not going to want to do it any
more...
t: do it
me: <-------looks at the couch lovingly
t: i said you want to run to miles...
t: do I need to threaten you?
me: lol
me: you say I want to run 2 miles?
t: yep...
me: you have decided I want to?
t: Yes...
t: now listen...
t: shhhh
t: sh
t: shhhhh
t: stopp typeing
t: stoip
me: k
t: ok
t: hey
t: I saw that k
t: ok
t: now you can type; repeat after me ok
t: I want to run 2 miles.....
t: say it
me: lol
t: not lol
t: I want to run 2 miles.....
me: t wants to run 2 miles
t: nope Kristy wants to run 2 miles
me: nope kristy wants to run 2 miles
t: good.
t: now..
t: <---pack stop watch
t: ok
t: now...
t: when I get there....
t: I am going to time you ik
t: ok
t: ;-P
me: omg
me: have you been talking to �him�?
t: nope
t: nope
t: nope
t: why?
me: �him� of the "buy this book...read it
all...I'm checking and you better be reading it!�
t: wy do you think that?
t: nope no test...
t: which book?
me: �him� of the "you're lazy...you need to
excercise...merry happy birthday ..here have some
excercise tapes"
t: nope...
t: this is something that I think you will
enjoy...
me: �him� of the "go get online and listen to
dr. atkins tell you how to get skinny"
t: Oh dr. atkins...
me: �him� of the "I will fix you, then I can
love you" disease
t: Go Protein power
t: nope.
t: I love you just the way you are...
t: what I want is you to love yourself
me: �him� of the just said today "you were
doing pretty good, just need to get you on track"
t: as much
t: what ever...
t: listen to me...
t: hello
me: hello
t: hello kristy
t: ok
t: do you know when some of my most peaceful
times are?
me: lol making jelly fish?
t: nope
t: that is stress full
me: oh come on you gotta laugh at that
t: becasue what iff the curtain came open
me: that is stressful?
me: lol
t: exactly...
t: some of the most peacful times are after
about 5 miles.....
t: I cannot hardly go another step...
t: the endorphins are pumping through my
system...
t: and the only thing on my mind is keep
going...
t: nothing else...other than "why don't I
quit smoking"
t: bu that is it...
t: no thoughts...
t: no problems exist then...
t: in fact I sing to myself
t: that is all...
t: then you know what happens?
t: when I get back....
me: you pass out ?
t: nope...
t: I feel like I am ready to go run again...
me: sick
t: let me tell you something here...
t: I have spent pretty much the last 3 months
sitting on my buttocks...
t: right...
me: ok
t: over the past week or so...
t: I have been picking up the pace more and
more everyday...
t: and I have been feeling better and better
every day...
t: you know why....
me: are ya gonna tell me?
t: because I have decided that I am going to
be all that I can be.....
t: ;-)
me: oh man
t: I am going to have my 18" bi cepts back...
t: I am going to have my 34 jeans back...
me: and what prompted all of this?
t: I am going to have my chisled legs back...
t: do you want to know the real truth?
me: always
t: one of my friends here said T...
t: you need to get off your ass and do
something....
t: and I started doing it and I am becoming
addicted again...
t: are you ready for a dark sid eof me?
me: lol...ok
t: for the nearly the past 3 years....
t: I have been hating the army...
me: omg no way
t: I have been doing the basic minumum to get
by...
t: I have let myself go....
me: i find this hard to believe
t: do you know the at one time...
t: I was 180 lbs of muscle....
t: I even had ripped abs and everything
me: ok I want to ask you a
question....something that I observed
me: ok?
me: can I?
t: ok
t: yep
me: i think you love the army deep down inside
me: i think someone made you question your
loyalty
me: and i think you feel you lost that
marriage because of the army
me: thats what I think
t: ok
t: maybe...
t: but now...
t: I am starting to get that be all youcan be
feeling back..
t: and I think it is just something that
everyone should enjoy....
t: I am not trying to change you...
me: that's a good feeling...
me: sure you are
t: I am trying to share the feeling with you
t: nope
me: but I'm not in the Army
t: so...
me: ok....
t: alot of people who run are not in the army
me: before we continue this can I tell you
something?
t: shoot
me: i had a conversation that i wish I had
saved
me: about 2 weeks ago
me: with �him�
t: ok
me: he's on this huge excercise kick
me: has been for awhile
me: i asked him if he could run
me: and how hard was it to learn to run
me: he said "why....are you seriously telling
me you want to run?"
me: to which I said something like..
me: 'what if you loved someone that did
something and you wanted to be a part of their
life....would you seriously try to learn about it?"
t: ...
t: awww
t: so do you want to learn?
me: yes...but i gotta tell ya
me: this all feels suspiciously like him
always trying to make me fit some fucking mold he had
in his head
t: lol
t: nope
t: no mold here....
t: lol
t: ;-)
t: but Kristy I am not trying to change
you...
t: trust em
t: me
me: but do you know where that thought comes
from?
t: where babe?
me: ok...let me interject something here..
t: ok
me: i realize and i have realized for a long
time that i'm not happy with my life and that there
are things that need to change and I have begun to
make those changes
t: ok
me: sometimes it all seems pointless and I
give up because i feel like i'm tackling the
impossible all alone and without any support
t: ok
me: and yup... I do these excercise
tapes...that �him� bought for me cause he wanted a size
5 ass
me: now he keeps getting size 5 asses and
calls me for everything else
me: go figure
t: brb
t: the ltu in kabul is down....so much for a
day off and going to the gym
t: but I have to go baby
me: ok
t: I am not trying change you...
t: I love you the way you are...
t: and If you had a size 5 ass...
t: i wouldn't look twice at you ok
me: lol
t: but I got to go
me: ok
me: i'm not upset with you
me: just so you know...
me: i think i get it
t: there are nothing but idiot operators in
this network and I have to everything for their stupid
asses...
t: so dont forget it
t: ok
t: I love you
t: bye
me: bye
Read a book? Learn a new skill? Now run 2 miles�be timed� phhft�
