PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

he doesn't care about the diary

Tuesday, Jan. 08, 2002
I think the diary issue is a dead one. And yeah I have another diary on diaryland besides this one, as a few of you are aware. It's not like this one and it is the one I was telling him about. But he just gave me carte blanche' so lets get down and party with my bad self!!!! Freeeedom from guilt. I am learning that addressing things solves them. Waaahooooooooo!

Me: there's something I've been wanting to talk to you about for a couple days now cause it's been making me feel guilty

Him: ok

Him: what

Me: ok....we talked about the diary thing a few days ago......remember how you said that I probably had one with a different name?

Him: yep

Me: well....

Me: I do have a different one

Me: but hear me out

Him: ok

Me: I started it

Me: and

Me: its different

Me: its not like poetical was

Me: but when you said that

Me: I felt guilty

Me: here...go see

Him: no

Me: I don't like feeling like I'm hiding something from you

Him: dont show me

Me: yes

Him: no

Me: I want you to see

Him: i dont wanna know

Me: its not like that one was

Him: i dont want to know

Him: no

Him: keep it to yourself

Me: its not me takling about my life

Me: or you

Him: no more diary for me

Him: no

Him: no

Him: no

Him: no

Him: no

Him: no

Me: ok but let me explain something about it

Me: every entry is one or two sentences

Me: like ...

Me: "my reply is silence for there is no sound to this thought" is one of em

Him: LQQK

Me: "i'd like to walk around the curve of your smile" is another

Me: its like fortunes in cookies

Him: if you want to have an online diary

Me: short

Him: go for it

Him: but just dont show me the link

Me: wait.......this isn't something I did to hide from you

Me: its something I did before

Him: then i wont know and there wont be a problem

Me: its got the clouds picture on it

Me: remember the clouds?

Me: I had a clouds picture on it and then my host died and I had to get a new clouds

Him: LOOK

Him: I DONT WANNA KNOW

Me: I heard you

Him: end of diary discussion

Him: if you want one go 4 it just dont tell me or show me

Me: but that made me feel like somehow I was lying to you and I refuse to do that

Him: ok

Him: but now im telling you to not tell me

Him: about any new or existing diaries

Me: ok

Him: kewl

Me: but I promise swear its not personal

Me: its poetic lines

Me: its like fortunes from cookies

Me: i fuck with html on that site and try to make each entry different somehow

Him: you dont get it do u

Him: I DONT WANNA KNOW

Me: fine

Him: good

Me: when you can talk to me without yelling let me know

Him: ok

Him: but you kept going on and on

Him: long after i said i dont wanna know first time

Me: ok from now on I'll hide everything from you

Him: get real

Him: we are talking about one thing

Him: you need to reread this conversation

Him: and see where you kept going on and on and on

Him: and your still doing it

Me: i have twice and theres no good reason for you to START TO YELL AT ME!!!!!!!!!!!

Him: yes there is

Him: you refuse to respect my wishes when i said i dont wanna know the first time

Him: Go read

Me: ok I read it

Me: for the 3rd time

Him: good

Him: now did i ask nice the first time

Me: yes

Him: ok now its my turn

Him: Why wasnt asking you nice the first time sufficient for you

Me: *shrugs*

Me: shoulda been

Him: are you tired

Me: maybe

Him: if you tell me look i dont want to discuss catheters ever again

Him: id remember that

Me: if I told you that we would never be able to talk again!

Me: lol

Him: ok

Me: just remember one thing for me ok?

Him: sure

Me: just one thing

Me: and I want you to try to disclaim this statement of mine

Me: because I bet you can't

Him: lets see

Him: i have to see what im betting on before i bet

Me: I HAVE NEVER PUT ANY RESTRICTIONS ON WHAT YOU COULD OR COULD NOT DISCUSS WITH ME."

Him: true

Him: but you always have that option

Him: and in this case

Him: it has nothing to with being interested or not

Him: it has to do with its better i didnt know

Me: ok

Him: i am not a number #1 fan of an online diary

Him: never was

Him: but that doesnt mean you cant have one

Him: i just choose not to know

Me: thats ok too, you have that right

Me: but let me just ask you one thing

Me: can you see why it was buggin me?

Him: one thing again

Him: yeah cause i hit it right on the head

Me: do you know that I don't want to hide things from you?

Him: yes

Him: but let this be the exception

Me: ok I just don't want to ever lie to you again

Him: i understand

Me: I hope so. I'm sorry if I upset you.

Him: no you didnt

Him: you sorta upset yourself

Me: yeah story of my life

12:00 a.m. ::
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