PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

one good day....

Sunday, Apr. 28, 2002
Someone in Seattle thinks I�m boring and I am so fucking thrilled by this comment you can�t even imagine. I mean�.my life has been one hell hole of an event after another for the last 3 � years and so now BORING is just what the doctor ordered. Ahhhh�I�m so happy I�m boring.

Today was an absolutely perfect day in my life. Husband, �Bucky� and I went to the beach. There�s nothing like laying half naked baking in the beautiful sunshine reading a great book while drinking a cold wine cooler watching your child frolic in the white sands. Seeing the blue skies envelope you like a giant warm blanket. Listening to the be-bop of tunes of all natures and likes mixing into the air to fill your ears. There�s nothing like a day like that. Driving home with the t-tops off and watching the brilliant colors of life swim around you. It was awesome and I needed it badly.

Wednesday is our 11th wedding anniversary. We�re ditching out of work on Tuesday and going to an amusement park without �Bucky� who will be safely tucked in at school, and we�re gonna ride the roller coasters, get wet on the water rides and generally behave like children and laugh and just have some much needed childlike time. I can�t wait. 11 years!!! Unreal. Especially after the last few�who woulda thought we�da made it this far.

I am bronzed from the sun and can still smell the coconut on my skin from my tanning oil. I can hear the slight sounds of Nickelodeon coming in from the sunroom and I feel happy and alive and blessed right now to be right where I am enjoying my life again. Husband just ran out to get some Chinese and then we�re gonna snuggle on the couch and watch a movie and this is where I want to be. This is my life and it�s really not so bad.

Now if I could just get past the waves of depression that engulf me for unexplainable reasons. But I refuse to jump on the drugtrain and call myself cured like most of the people on diaryland do. Pop a pill and make believe�. Just like the lyrics of my song.. *sigh* I refuse to go that way. Absolutely refuse. And besides..I�m not convinced that it works. I don�t see anyone popping pretty colored happiness. Not happiness that is real.

Its these moments when I feel alive and happy and content that I have to take memory pictures of so I can play back a filmstrip on my emotionally rainy days.

Yeah I�m boring�and I�m cheering about it. Because boring is enormously happy to me. I remember a few years back some neighbors (NOT THE CLEVERS!!!) told us that we were boring neighbors. That our lives were so typically suburban and normal. I crave that boringness again. I want it.

The sun is streaming down into my keyboard and my tan fingers are dancing over the keys with a perfect rhythm and I see the value in the smallest things. Boring� mmmmmm perfection. It must be raining in Seattle today.

-PoeticaL

One good day of the weekend I'll be up again,
One good day of the week I'll be higher than the Government
-Starsailor
6:24 p.m. ::
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