he's so damn cool

�t�: but your online diary� it is...

�t�: for you to share with your internet friends..

Me: i know it sounds crazy but I get good advice there

Me: those people are not involved in my life

Me: they see stuff I miss

�t�: exactly

�t�: exactly...

�t�: and can you do me this favor

Me: what?

�t�: ?

Me: sure

Me: name it

Me: let me have it

Me: c'mon tell me

�t�: don't ever tell me where it is

�t�: your diary

Me: I didn't tell him

�t�: I am not going to search for it..

Me: he made it his business to find it, but it was my fault too

�t�: lol

Me: he did

�t�: I won't

Me: and thing is I never said his name

�t�: that is your "private circle"

Me: and I never lied about anything on there

Me: yes I lied to him...yes it was wrong.....I told him because it was wrong and I want to make my life all right

�t�: ok..

�t�: it is stuff that he had no business looking at..

�t�: hypothetical situation ok..

Me: ok

�t�: you and I have "hooked up" and doing the nasty dance ok

Me: lol ok

�t�: ok

Me: i like you're hypothetical thinking.....

�t�: lol

�t�: ok

�t�: anyways..

�t�: if I was talking to my friends about the err nasty dance stuff...

�t�: and you heard it...it might make you mad

�t�: you know..

Me: yeah...

�t�: guy shower talkk type of stuff

Me: as long as you say something that makes those guys jealous of you......I'm happy

Me: ok ok...sorry...continue

�t�: the way my mind is racing right now...

�t�: OH BOY

�t�: but...

�t�: that is why I don't care what you say about me....it is none of my business...what you say about me in your diary...

Me: but �t�....

�t�: is this making any sense

Me: there's not one girl out there that doesnt' want to know how to get to ya

�t�: ?

Me: I dig you

Me: in a big way

Me: and when I write about you it comes across

�t�: ok...nothing wrong with that

Me: and.....there's a lot of people that have been reading for a year now

Me: they know how unhappy I've been

Me: so for them to see someone making me smile...making me believe in things....

Me: they're happy for me

Me: I get a lot of "he sucks...quit talking to him....how's t?" comments

�t�:

�t�: I am not going to tell you to stop talking to him...it is in your nature not to

Me: I think right now if I said something bad about you they'd kill me

Me: well here's the thing �t�

�t�: I doubt that...just remind them I am only a man

Me: i really realized that he's not a bad person.......and I"m not a bad person for things I did

Me: it's just some people are bad for each other

Me: and there's where we're at

�t�: like I said...

Me: I have a question

�t�: I am not going to tell you to stop talking to you...

�t�: shoot

�t�: 20?

Me: tell me that's not how it's going to ever be.....is it going to be that way.....are we gonna end up sorry we got to know each other?

�t�: I can only hope not...

�t�: but..

�t�: niether of us can see the future

Me: i feel bad cause this has nothing to do with you but can you see why i'm struggling?

�t�: Yes I can see why.

Me: despite what everyone thinks...I said I wasn't going to do this

Me: I wanted to contact you...thank you for carrying a gun....Ididn't know you were a laptop warrior....and be done.

�t�:

�t�: I like that..

Me: laptop warrior?

�t�: Network Management Technician

�t�:

Me: teeheee

Me: ok ok

�t�: it is still nice verse

Me: i wish i could hug you

Me: cause i feel better

Me: and I don't know how you do that

�t�: *hugs*

�t�: I wish I could promise you the heavens and earth for ever and ever...

�t�: but I can't...

�t�: at least not yet

�t�: does that make any sense

Me: listen.....you're doing something for me that no one else has ever done and if you do nothing more ever it will forever mean something to me

Me: you are being my friend without conditions....

�t�:

Me: do you know how sweet that is?

Me: do you have any idea how much it means to me?

Me: do you know �t�?

Me: I hope you just know.

�t�:

�t�: I think I do

Me: think harder

Me:

�t�: why?

Me: because ....it means a lot

�t�: I do know haw much it means to you...

�t�: that is why..

�t�: I try to stop you from getting into those...

�t�: friendship destructive moods..

�t�: remember the "internet slap"?

Me: and I'm struggling right now because I made mistakes before and i want to get it straight in my head before i make mistakes with you.

Me: and yeah... "friendship destructive moods" ...that's me eh?

Me: how horrible

�t�: I don't have problem with that....either way I will be here...ok?

Me: ok �t�