PoeticaL
cluttering the net since 2001

Ten things that men can live without

Sunday, Mar. 02, 2003
1. a dish drainer

This is a device used to place wet dishes on to air dry. The men I live with stack their clean wet dishes on a big clean bathtowel.

2. dish towels

These are towels used to dry off dishes. There are none here. Although we do go through tons of papertowels and I did break down and buy some..*drum roll please*

3. dish clothes or what I refer to as "dishrags"

In their defense they did have sponges with the cool abrasive stuff on em, but somehow I'm just not assimilated to those things and I always wonder how clean can you get your dishes with a sponge that never gets cleaned?

4. a coffee scoop

In the past I could never live without my expensive $5 starbucks coffee scoop. I loved that thing. (happily I know it's in storage) I have witnessed Rick just "dumping" coffee freestyle into the coffee pot. Unreal. There's no way that coffee's taste can be predicted.

5. cleaning products

There is ONE bottle of 409 in this house. One bottle. Damn! For ten+ years I have never had just one bottle of any type of cleaner under my sink. Never. I almost always have had every type of cleaner under the sun. Toilet bowl cleaner, furniture polish, cleanser, electronics cleaner (yes they do sell cleaners just for electronics), and all sorts of other odds and ends cleaning products. Surprisingly I have only used 409 for the last month and a half and I realize I was wasting tons of money, because for some odd reason 409 will clean anything! Well....except for maybe the bathtub...that bastard needs some cleanser I swear!

6. a top sheet

For years I slept under sheets, blankets..all arranged just so. I have learned that as long as you have a quilt, or one blanket, you can sleep, you won't freeze and that top sheet...just another thing to get all tangeled up in, and besides you have to straighten that bastard and clean it. What's the point?? From now on...top sheet? Fuck it.

7. throw pillows

I love throw pillows. The more the merrier. The black couch in this joint... has no throw pillows. Not a one. While I thought of buying some...that black couch is not Rick's and so whatever furniture we purchase in the near future... the new throw pillows might not coordinate. This thought process brought me to the question "why do we have throw pillows?" We don't throw them anywhere, we constantly straighten out those bastards, wash them, plump them, and then throw them out far before they have paid for themselves. But... there is something homey about those things, so in my future with my future furniture I shall have throw pillows. Lots of em. Everywhere. Because in the end, I found that laying on the couch watching some kickass movie without a throw pillow gives me one giant kink in my neck.

8. wall art

While there are a few scant things on the walls here, a few family photos, one picture in the dining room, for the most part the walls are bare. At first this was a stark difference from the way I have lived in the past. I spent hours and hours planning my wall decor, hanging it, placing it straight, dusting it, moving it, considering it, etc. I have come to the conclusion...wall art? Fuck it! Worthless dust collecting items at best. Unless Bucky drew it, I don't want it.

9. hangers

Ok...this seems a silly thing, but I'm telling ya...these boys had no hangers. Rick was keeping his clothes folded laying on the top of his closet on the shelf. Randy keeps his clothes folded sitting on an entertainment center that has nothing else in it but his clothes. Oddness. How can people live without hangers? I mean fuck I had so many hangers when I moved in here that I gave some to Rick and his clothes are all hanging up nice and neat and so are mine! Hangers? Cheese and Rice you gotta have them!!

And last but never least...

10. knickknacks

Oh boy this is a big one. I used to have Precious Moments figurines (all bought for me by the ex, I left them alllll behind). I used to have teddy bears, cookie molds, glasses, antique bowls, and tons of candle holders, and even more than that, I had thousands of small cutsie dust collectors that had no purpose or use. In this apartment, there are a few glasses from Arigatos, (a Japanese style restaurant that rules!)they sell drinks in these awesome oriental glasses that you can keep. Outside of those glasses, there is nothing else. Not one other dust collecting cutsie wootsie thing. Ahhh....freedom from unwanted dust.

Knickknack patty whack give the dog a bone, this little girl will forever after have a knickknack free home.

Just to be sure that Rick and Randy were two typical and normal bachelor pad guys...I asked and verified this information (market research) with my good chat pal, the infamous and ever popular Jim.

Kwisty2k: do you have throw pillows in your home?
x0rg: i have one
x0rg: it has harleys on one side and a cumstain on the other
Kwisty2k: hahahahaha
Kwisty2k: do you have a dish drainer in your kitchen?
x0rg: no
x0rg: don't have any dishes either
Kwisty2k: do you have pictures on your walls?
x0rg: i have some posters on the ceiling
Kwisty2k: do you have a top sheet on your bed?
x0rg: well
x0rg: i did
x0rg: but its on the floor now
Kwisty2k: :-)
Kwisty2k: do you own any cleaning products?
x0rg: shampoo
x0rg: some fast orange hand cleaner
Kwisty2k: do you own a coffee scoop?
x0rg: probably have a can of engine degreaser somewhere
x0rg: no
Kwisty2k: dish towels?
x0rg: no dishes
x0rg: no towels
Kwisty2k: i suppose you never cook either?
x0rg: no
x0rg: i'm an eater
x0rg: not a cooker
Kwisty2k: haaaa
Kwisty2k: eat me
Kwisty2k: eat me
x0rg: cook yourself
Kwisty2k: lol
Kwisty2k: ok
Kwisty2k: <---sits on the hot stove
Kwisty2k: do you have knickknacks?
x0rg: i have a glock 22
x0rg: thats sort of a knicknack
Kwisty2k: haaaa
Kwisty2k: do you have hangers in your closet?
x0rg: i think i have one
x0rg: winter coats, you know
Kwisty2k: ok that settles it.....
Kwisty2k: its a bachelor thing
Kwisty2k: i was just wondering if these two guys I live with were normal
Kwisty2k: ha
x0rg: yeah
x0rg: probably so
Kwisty2k: well thanks for the market research
x0rg: no worries
Kwisty2k: i thought everyone owned hangers
Kwisty2k: ha boy was I wrong
Kwisty2k: oddly enough when I provide these things, they are accepted quite well
x0rg: yeah
x0rg: like they didnt know they existed
x0rg: "hm, dishrack"
x0rg: "good call"
Kwisty2k: ha


One almost last thing...a certain someone put this comment --> "She's trying to sort through a few things in life" in her profile about me. I'd just like to say...a few? ha! I haven't got anything figured out...but yes I am trying...really I am so thanks for recognizing that fact. It touched me for some reason that someone sees that about me. Spanks!

The absolute last thing...last night I ran into Diane and her and I ended up out with two gay boys at a gay bar where I had more penis rubbed up against my hips and ass than I have ever had in one night, and all of it for not, because without a penis you can get no penis...but I also had a gay boy ask me to give him pussy for the first time. To which I replied, I'm so sorry but I have given it to others before so you have to ask someone else. Being in a gay bar watching all that sexual tension flying around just served to make me miss Rick all the more this weekend. Ugh....but it was interesting and it was great to see Diane...its been a month. Cathy, the girl that hooked Rick and I up together also hooked Diane up with her brother Mark. Diane is so happy and I'm so happy and when we met we were crying on each other. So last night being in a gay bar...being happy about our lives...having a drink, it was great. It was just ....great. Full circle kinda great. Ok ok I'm shutting up now. Bless you if you read all of this...geesh!

-PoeticaL
1:10 a.m. ::
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