zoloft?
Thursday, Apr. 03, 2003
Before we got our own place we got along amazingly well. Now I�m agitated and we fight way too much. Last night I threw his lighter and it flew behind him and hit the wall, 6 inches over and it might have hit him. He threw a CD on the floor saying �I can throw things too.� The case cracked into a thousand pieces. I�m going back to the shrink and getting some more happy pills. I swear that�s the only thing that�s changed. It�s me. Yeah it�s me�not him. I know I shouldn�t write this here because within a matter of minutes someone will tell me something that won�t help my mood, etc. I�m calling the doctor�. Rick won�t answer the phone, and I don�t blame him. Maybe I couldn�t go from being married in December to being in a relationship living with someone just a few weeks later. But I don�t think that�s the problem at all. It�s something chemical and I need that drug, I was so different, so much calmer and coping so much better with everything. Last night I had this major headache, didn�t eat for like 9 hours and was running around doing errands/working when I should have just gone to bed. I just cracked, holding it all in for months, all the anger and pain and I just�I�m just messed up I guess.
I�m trying so hard�but before�before we got our own place I didn�t have to try and it was perfect. Zoloft�I need that drug I suppose. Ugh�live and learn. Now where do I get that extra $80 a month??
-PoeticaL
