Goodbye Bryan!
Tonight I ended a long time Internet friendship. (3 years) It just got to the point where I was holding back and listening to bullshit all the time and not speaking my mind. Fuck that. I am not perfect but neither is he. I got tired of listening to the way he spoke about his so-called friends. It all made me wonder how the fuck he was talking about me. I don�t like that shit. And of course its bad to tell me that �he� is a bad influence on me when I have actually gotten my head out of the fucking angst ridden gutter in the last 2 years and I�m not going to let anyone tell me that he�s been a bad influence on me. I have a better job because of his influence. I might be more like him because of his influence but he�s not a bad person. He�s the reason I am alive. SOOOOO Bryan you can kindly fuck off! I�m tired of holding back my opinions and feelings for the sake of saying I have a friend. That is not �friendship� at all!
Bry: I just called off of work..I�m freeee
PoeticaL: why?
Bry: I just didn�t feel like going
PoeticaL: That�s not good, I never call off just because I don�t �feel like� going
Bry: but you have regualr hours and regular days off
PoeticaL: ok
PoeticaL: so��.
Bry: try working my hours sometime
PoeticaL: go get a job where you have regular hours and regular days off...its not cool to call off regardless of your reasons
PoeticaL: if you're not happy with your job get a new one
Bry: yuck, you're getting sickening
Bry: i'm not liking this new incarnation of you
Bry: but, if you want to emulate �him� in every way, have at it..........but you won't have many friends left
PoeticaL: geez
PoeticaL: my opinion about calling off has nothing to do with him
PoeticaL: i've always had that
PoeticaL: always gone to work
PoeticaL: and if I wasn't happy with a job I left it and got a better one
PoeticaL: you and I both know you don't like your job so much...you're stagnate cause you feel you make good money but you don't like that job
PoeticaL: we both know it
PoeticaL: so
PoeticaL: whatever
Bry: yeah, I have my moments, but I'm vested in the retirement part, unless I really had something going that was great, it would be kinda foolish to not get my 30 yrs in at least, which is what is required to get full retirement benefits
Bry: i only have about 9 yrs left to get my 30
PoeticaL: only 9?
PoeticaL: well I hope you make it
PoeticaL: cause otherwise you were miserable for nothing
Bry: i'm not that miserable
PoeticaL: well that's for you to decide not me
PoeticaL: i think you are merely complacent
PoeticaL: i think you are too set in your ways
Bry: to some degree, yes
PoeticaL: scared to do anything else
PoeticaL: so when someone, mainly me! points this stuff out to you you don't like it
PoeticaL: because you are forced to think about it
PoeticaL: if I didn't say this
PoeticaL: you'd trudge through your day like you normally do
PoeticaL: I have learned from �him� to access my life and go after the things that matter to me most
Bry: lol
PoeticaL: and I will NEVER EVER be complacent
PoeticaL: because of a retirement fund
PoeticaL: or any other fucking reason
PoeticaL: ever!
PoeticaL: and if you think I'm full of shit
Bry: lol
Bry: i do
PoeticaL: then ask me how the hell I'm signed up to take classes to do what I truly want to do and where the money came from for my laptop.....I've been working on the side
PoeticaL: doing other shit to get where I want to go
PoeticaL: I got another raise at work
PoeticaL: because I said I was looking to leave and pursue other things
PoeticaL: they gave me another raise on Friday
PoeticaL: to keep me there
PoeticaL: complacency wouldn't have gotten me another raise
PoeticaL: I have things I want to do
PoeticaL: and nothing
PoeticaL: not you
PoeticaL: and your shit about me becoming more like �him� or needing to grow up or anything else is going to change what I'm doing
PoeticaL: you need to understand something about me
PoeticaL: I HAVE A FUCKING CHILD
PoeticaL: its a BIG responsibility
PoeticaL: and
Bry: boy, �he� created miss frankenstein
PoeticaL: the last few days
PoeticaL: I have had a lot on my mind because I allowed my son to leave the state
PoeticaL: That might not be a great thing for me to do
PoeticaL: I did it for Bucky's sake.
PoeticaL: you think the whole world is about sitting around watching tv eating sandwiches
PoeticaL: you have no clue what real life is about
PoeticaL: if complacency is what you want
PoeticaL: welcome to your life
PoeticaL: thats all it is
Bry: lol
PoeticaL: complacency
PoeticaL: "I have to go to work...I have to work there.....9 more years for retirement"
PoeticaL: yeah
PoeticaL: yippy skippy
Bry: you're on a roll.....
PoeticaL: your so fucking happy you shit smiley faces for turds
PoeticaL: you go to work so that you can buy fancy ass cheese and convince yourself that you have a life
Bry: ok, enough is enough
PoeticaL: that you're happy
PoeticaL: you hang around goofballs like Liz and Greg so that you can feel better about yourself
PoeticaL: otherwise you'd have friends that weren't nut cases
Bry signed off at 2:11:33 AM.
Bry signed on at 2:20:57 AM.
Bry: one more tirade like that and we are no longer going to be friends, if that matters to you.......I've had it with your abusive speech, which you don't even seem to recognize as such, but oh well, it's your choice
Bry: are we at an understanding here?
Bry: hello?
PoeticaL: sure
PoeticaL: the truth hurts don't it?
Bry: sure what?
PoeticaL: sure I understand
Bry: I wonder..... from your last comment you don't seem to
PoeticaL: no I understand
Bry: I'm serious about this
PoeticaL: ok
Bry: may I tell you something?
PoeticaL: yes you can tell me anything you like
Bry: from my own experience....
Bry: sometimes you can take on attributes of people you get close to, good or bad........and from what I can gather, you have taken on some bad attributes from �him�, the analyzing and then trying to depict every "bad aspect" of someone is not good, healthy or anything else. You were not always this way, I know........and me, personally, I don't think it's a good thing, but you do as you wish or see fit, this is just my own personal observation.
PoeticaL: OMG
PoeticaL: you saying this shit to me?
PoeticaL: you?
PoeticaL: mr "lets analyze the fuck out of Liz's codependency"
PoeticaL: you need to go sit down in a chair and think about what you just said to me
Bry: I just did
PoeticaL: hypocrite!
Bry: not hardly
Bry: you are comparing apples to oranges
PoeticaL: no you just said this to me...the analyzing and then trying to depict every "bad aspect" of someone is not good, healthy or anything else. You just don't like the bad aspect that I pointed out.
PoeticaL: It bothers you so badly and terribly because it's the truth.
Bry: no, that's not it at all
PoeticaL: I know because thats how I get when you point certain things out to me.
PoeticaL: I get mad.
Bry: not that there isn't SOME truth to what you have said, you are not really in a place to totally understand and make a fair evaluation of my job
PoeticaL: I know you don't love it and thats all I need to know to know that you trudge along for the sake of money and money is never self fulfilling.
Bry: I'm not mad cuz of what you have said is all truth, because it is not, and to depict me as someone that only hangs around people like" greg and liz" and whatever you said about them, is not a kind thing to say, and unnecessary to say the least
PoeticaL: well I can see partly what you are saying but if they are truly your real "friends" then be a "real" friend back and quit talking such shit about them.
Bry: i don't talk "shit" about greg, and quit telling me what I need to do!!
PoeticaL: From what you tell me Liz is codependent and not worth your time and Gregs bad for not affording a telephone
PoeticaL: do you expect people to be "perfect" before you can say nice things about them?
PoeticaL: I'm positive you talk shit about me to them.
PoeticaL: I'm sure you're not selective about who you put down.
Bry: Look, I'm starting to get pissed about this greg thing ....I never said anything bad about greg, you DUMBASS!!!
PoeticaL: you asked me if I would turn off my phone in order to save money, when I said yes and that I understood Greg's need to do that you told me that was plain STUPID
Bry: oh you're positive huh? well then be positive
PoeticaL: *shrugs*
PoeticaL: I only know what I have been told.
Bry: I haven't but believe what you will, and so what if I said it was stupid?
PoeticaL: he's your friend, he's going through some rough times...be supportive
Bry: I never said greg was stupid, only that his plan wasn't the greatest idea
PoeticaL: or dont' call him your friend!
PoeticaL: its his life
PoeticaL: MR JUDGMENTAL!
Bry: I am supportive of him, y
PoeticaL: you like to judge everyone else but the minute I judge you you can't take it
Bry: <----throws hands up
Bry: I give up
Bry: this is fritless
Bry: friutless
PoeticaL: you're right....I can't pick fruit off of a tree unwilling to grow
Bry: you go and do your thing with �him� and whoever, I'm going my own way.....good luck
PoeticaL: let me tell you something LOUD AND CLEAR and don't you ever forget it! �him� is ten times the man that you are. TEN FUCKING TIMES! And he isn't a judgemental fuck like you!
Bry: great, good luck
PoeticaL: Bryan you are NOT PERFECT. You need to seriously think about the way in which you judge everyone around you.
PoeticaL: Its sickening.
PoeticaL: Completely.
Bry: goodbye
PoeticaL: Goodbye.
PoeticaL: oh one last thing...if I was to take on anyone�s attributes I'm glad they weren't yours!
PoeticaL: the illusion of job safety and retirement benefits is exactly that whats to say the company won't fire him after . . .ohhh . . . 29 years and whats to say that the company that his company uses to invest his 401k with . . . doesn't go belly up . . .
PoeticaL: a smart man said this and he's fucking right!
Bry: not really
PoeticaL: whatever
Bry: like i said, you don't have a clue
PoeticaL: if you do then I'm glad I don't
Bry: RR Retirement is not a 401k, just for your and his info, so next time understand what you are talking about before you spout off, ok?
PoeticaL: oh but you have to be their whore so to speak for another 9 years of misery....good luck
Bry: you've lost it
PoeticaL: I'm glad
Bry: whatever flots your boat
PoeticaL: listen
Bry: floats
PoeticaL: I'm sick of you
PoeticaL: sick sick sick of your holier than thou shit
PoeticaL: sick of your "I know better than you" attitude
Bry: go jump in a cold lake
PoeticaL: sick of you calling me when I'm busy
PoeticaL: sick of you
PoeticaL: sick sick sick
PoeticaL: entirely sick of your shit
PoeticaL: Fuck Off
PoeticaL: you're so stupid
Bry: good, that's why i said goodbye
PoeticaL: you haven't known for the last 3 months that I've been blowing you off
Bry: GOODBYE
PoeticaL: I fucking hung up on you
PoeticaL: you called back
PoeticaL: you're pathetic
PoeticaL: you have no one
PoeticaL: no friends
PoeticaL: and for the record
Bry: GOODBYE
PoeticaL: I think I'd like your fathers wife far better than you. I doubt she talks half as much shit about you. There....now you won't come back talking to me about anything!
PoeticaL: Ever.
PoeticaL: ever.
PoeticaL: we're all done
PoeticaL: finished
PoeticaL: THE FUCKING END
Bry: GOODBYE
PoeticaL: hey..
Mr Entropy: yes?
PoeticaL: would you work for a company for 30 years and be miserable just for the mere "promise" of retirement benefits?
Mr Entropy: nope . . . it probably wouldn't pan out anyway . . .
Mr Entropy: fuck being happy then . . . i want to be happy now . . .
Mr Entropy: fuck old age . . . i won't be able to do anything with my happiness then . . .
Mr Entropy: except die with it . . .
PoeticaL: Josh?
Mr Entropy: yes?
PoeticaL: I love you
PoeticaL: I love you like the birds love their ability to balance on a mere wire in high winds.
Mr Entropy: uhhhh . . . suuuuuuuuurrrrrrrreeeeeeeeee
PoeticaL: I love you like kites love the summer blue sky.
PoeticaL: I love you like a baby loves his pacifier.
Mr Entropy: and why is that?
PoeticaL: I'll show ya soon enough