unraveling

�There is no such thing as 'too late' when it's really love.�



Someone said the above to me about my last entry. I think I will write that sentence down so many times my hands will go numb, my fingers will bleed, my pen will die�.at least long enough that I feel it instead of just reading it.

Faith is something I�ve never had enough of. For the last year and a half I didn�t have faith that every man would not destroy me like my ex. I forgot to warn myself about self destruction.

To the girl in the 503 area code of the world�your words�made me cry in a public library so hard the old lady next to me said, �don�t you just hate that when you start crying without control?� and she handed me her zip lock baggie of blue Kleenex.

Two more interviews tomorrow, three today, one was a total bust, two others not deciding until next week and frustration grows like a bad weed in a perfect flower bed.

Going to pick up Cathy (who�s lying to her current boyfriend) and taking her to see the last boyfriend. I do this not because I agree, but because she does everything I ask her to do for me. But�I want to grab her by the arms and scream loud into her face �what are you doing? Exactly what are you doing�because let me tell you how badly you are messing everything up�.love with all your heart or don�t love anyone at all� but don�t do this halfway shit all over the place!� The fact that she�s lying to two men�a lie is a single untruth that will untangle every tangible thing you think you have�.trust me I know�I�m unraveling daily because I lied to myself saying I�d never get hurt as long as I held it all back�

-PoeticaL